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ranDOMinion
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Irritainment

Tuesday, June 22, 2004
Bob sure had one heck of a salmon day. You know the kind, you spend all day swimming upstream only to get screwed and end up dieing in the end anyways.

He arrived late to the Cube Farm. Upon entry, he wasn't feeling very well. He attempted some crop dusting, to relieve his gascious pressure. Sure, he felt mildly better, but crop dusting around the cube farm produced a lot of prarie dogging. Think about it, if someone farted near your desk, you'd want to know who it was.

Later, Bob found himself surround by a bunch of mouse-potatoes wanting their e-mail servers fixed, and their phone receivers replaced. Bob sure had his fair share of work to do, until his seagull of a manager flew in, made a lot of noise, shat on everything, then took off. Typical. Now he had his fair share of work to do AND a big mess to clean up.

He started with the servers. They were most crucial. They were the communicaion all those idiot Four-Oh-Fours needed to do their jobs. Suddenly, the most typologically bodacious office babe walked in. Asheley, of course.

"Bob," Asheley said in her most seductively nerdy voice, "Maybe you should try the stapler".

Dumbfounded by her amazing whit and resourcefulness, Bob took her stapler which she readily gave him, and he began some percussive maintenance.

Once Bob stopped, he looked at the server and had an ohnosecond. He realized he had pounded the thing into a heap of trash. Now there was no hope getting it fixed at all!
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