A Function of Malice: Reasons Why Batman Sucks
2. Mommy and Daddy die. Hah!
3. Batmobile? Full of himself much?
4. His butler does all the real work.
5. No super powers.
**Note: this is not a StopFiveRecord, but does borrow the format.
9 Comments:
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Good Sir,
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I find that this direct attack on the character and figure of Batman is ungallant and insensitive and has direct characteristics of childish bullying.
Not only is Batman one of the greatest of the heroine race because of reasons 1 and 5. But the fact that he overcame the death of his parents, which is not a trifle issue; and definitely not a laughing matter. He instead overcame his fear of losing someone and trusted his beloved butler as a confidant and as a comrade of arms to fight injustice and evil.
Again I point out that he is neither a clueless scientist nor photographer, nor is he from an alien race that either out of stupidity fell into thier super powers or were given them by birth. Batman is simply a man like you or I that chose to make a difference and overcome his weaknesses to live not for himself but rather to fight for the weaker among us. They being weaker either by choice or circumstances could not fight for themselves, but rather needed a hero to rescue them.
So to you good sir I say good day. I am both disappointed in your lack of understanding and your lack of insight for not seeing the greatest hero for who he really is. Thee greatest of the comic hero's
, at 2:26 p.m.
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i would like to follow up Mr Highandmighty's discourse with this character rendering comment he made to me immediately after publilshing:
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Matt says:
take that and shove it
Matt says:
ass
I rest my case.
Andrew, at 2:30 p.m.
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ummmmmm, no. 3 was never really argued so I shall do that!
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actually... no arguement, who would name a vehicle the "batmobile"? Spiderman didn't name his bike spidebike MattyRob, at 5:55 p.m.
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My defense:
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1. No superpowers, yet he kicks more bad guy ass than an ass kicking machine.
2. Parental death not funny, but death does have a way of being a catalyst for great heroes. ie)Uncle Ben/Spiderman, Jonathan Kent/Superman, Daredevil's Dad/Daredevil...I'm sure there are more, I just don't care enough to look it up.
3. Batmobile. What else would he call it? It's not like it's an ordinary car tht he named, the thing is a technological wonder, that is somewhat Bat-like in its appearance.
4. Alfred does what any normal butler/surrogate father would do. Bruce Wayne still makes the money, and stays intereted in what his businesses do, juggling two identities in the process.
5. Ass kicking. He also fights (and wins) many opponents that others such as Superman or Wonder Woman face.
6. Eat it Andrew. , at 6:55 p.m.
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Add another one.
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6. Christian Bale?! You couldn't do any better?! Stephanie, at 9:05 p.m.
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i would like to draw all your attention to the title of the post, particularly the first half. it reads: "a function of malice".
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now, perhaps some of you are familiar with the term "malice". or perhaps have heard its adjective conjugate, "malicious". ofcourse, you will clearly see and know that someone who is malicious (i may be such a someone) does things simply to cause a ruckus. thus i would deem this function of malice a complete success.
also note: this post, as well as 99% of the posts i make, have very little to do with what i believe about anything.
you have all submitted to my experiment and proved this: when prodded jokingly, the people semi-jokingly prod back. i had fun thansk guys! Andrew, at 9:13 a.m.
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ps: don't make me use the ultimate comeback, i'll do it.
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i'll do it. Andrew, at 9:28 a.m.
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Look who's trying to back out of his bull-headedness. You've been saying batman sucks since I met you. Don't try to claim that this particular post has nothing to do with your own opinion!
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BACKER OUTTER!
It truly is ashame that you don't have the courage to stand for your oppinion now that you're mostly all alone.
For shame.. , at 4:12 p.m.
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matt, you leave me no choice...
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whatever man, my girlfriend's hot. Andrew, at 4:50 p.m.